Eh? Doctor who? What’s he talking about…? Are you taller? Why? Do you have to reach a high shelf? Now, don’t antagonize her. I love a happy medium! Boring. And I hate hotels. Have faith, Brigadier. Have I ever led you astray? I am the Doctor! The original you might say! What?! Come out. And don’t touch anything! ‘Timey’ what? ‘Timey wimey’? An unintelligent enemy is far less dangerous than an intelligent one…. You can spend the rest of your life with me, but I can’t spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on. Alone. That’s the curse of the Time Lords.
This stuff, or whoever sent it, is cleverer than we are. Unfortunate, isn’t it? No idea. Just do what I do: hold tight and pretend it’s a plan. We are always in trouble! Isn’t it extraordinary—it follows us everywhere. Did I? It must be the carrot juice making me colour blind! Jo, look. That’s Skaro. I was being chased by a giant dinosaur, but I think I’ve managed to give it the slip. Oh, you’ve got a dinosaur too! One day, just one day, maybe I’ll meet somebody who gets the whole ‘don’t wander off’ thing.
Oh, I always rip out the last page of a book. Then it doesn’t have to end. I hate endings! No. That is not the question. That is not where we start. I am not a student of human nature. I am a professor of a far wider academy of which human nature is merely a part. Oh, yes. Harmless is just the word: that’s why I like it! Doesn’t kill, doesn’t wound, doesn’t maim. But I’ll tell you what it does do: it is very good at opening doors! Nine hundred years of time and space, and I’ve never been slapped by someone’s mother.